I had a midterm today that I completely blew. It was a hammer and nail situation and I was the nail. It’s not that… “oh, here comes the excuses”. Okay, I’ll save you the saddest story in the world. Wo is me after all.
I think the result hurt my pride more than anything else. I wanted to do well because I want to be able to practice my craft well. I believe I’m capable of that. The reality is that it’s my own fault for not being as prepared as I needed to be going in to it. Facing that reality makes one look themselves in the mirror and reflect on their short comings. And let me tell you, that stings!
Failure is natural in this life, and it will happen time and time again. As Mike D of the Beastie Boys says: “As time goes by in this give and take / As long as I learn I will make mistakes”. I find that to be very true.
In the grand scheme of things, it’s not the end of the world. Like I said, it’s more of an ego bruising than a real defeat.
I believe the true measure of a mistake is based on your mindset following it. The initial shock and response to the situation is what I refer to as the recoil. Once the initial shock wears off, this is when you start processing and thinking again. It’s like when you jump in an ice bath and your body reacts by seizing up instinctually. Then after about 30 seconds to a minute later, you start to calm down enough that you can start to process your thoughts once more.
I want another shot at it and I’m convinced I can learn from my mistakes. I just have to be patient and make the necessary changes to my preparation to have a different outcome next time.
And hey; you can’t have a redemption story without some sort of short coming to set the scene. This just makes the path a little more rewarding once I get there.
Peter Linton
Software Developer
